Celebrating the first anniversary of In the Same Breath
... and envisioning where to go from here ...
This has been a huge year for me. A huge few years really. And I’ve been grateful for everyone who’s subscribed to In the Same Breath. This newsletter has been a way for me to be seen in my process of discovering my nature, by people who I want to be seen by right now.
When I start up a new thing, I’m always a bit incredulous at myself. When I commit to doing something on a regular basis, I have a knee-jerk reaction that wants to blow up that structure. It’s an uncomfortable constraint on that future version of myself.
But I got a major insight from listening to Harry Thompson’s talk at the 2018 PDA conference (which I can’t find anymore on the PDA North America resources page). He said he can’t do anything, he can only be a thing. He doesn’t write a book, he is the book. He doesn’t give a talk, he is the talk. It’s when the thing becomes distinct from who he is, that little gap is where the demand creeps in.
When I heard Harry say that, something clicked for me. Fundamentally I have always been the same way. And no matter how rational and advantageous a goal might be, if it isn’t something I can’t fully embody, that ominous demand slithers inside and … fucks everything up.
But that means I have to bring my full self to what I’m doing. And in fact, there is no doing at all. There is only being.
That’s … really fucking vulnerable. That means I need to be totally … myself! And being myself is completely at odds with all the shame I’ve internalized over my life.
Interesting conundrum huh?
So this newsletter is my experiment with taking Harry’s advice. My hack for leaning into my shadow. Sort of ripping off the bandaid. I needed to be seen in owning my true nature. I continue to need that. And that’s why I’ve now been writing this newsletter for a year. The longevity isn’t dependent on my level of discipline, so much as how embodied I can be while I’m doing it.
So what’s next for me and In the Same Breath?
Well, taking this embodiment principle further, maybe the more “myself” I can be in my work, the more will naturally manifest from my work. And that means I need a mechanism for sharing more personal stuff, without completely nuking my privacy online.
When I do webinars with PDA North America (which I highly recommend), I get a lot of questions from parents about how I’ve overcome various obstacles presented by being PDA. And what I’m currently working through in that regard. Their questions have underscored the tremendous challenges we have to overcome as PDA individuals. Their feedback reminds me what an achievement it really is to be a functional human living in integrity with my community. Actually that’s an achievement for literally anyone, let alone someone who’s PDA.
I want to celebrate and expose more of these challenges as they’re coming up for me. Because there’s beauty in them, and it would be a shame to hide them out of … shame. Right?
So I’ve been working on some content that goes into much more depth about my work with neurodiverse folks, what I’m doing to refine my medicine protocol, and how I’m approaching my career as a (serial) startup engineer. If I can muster the courage, I’ll start to put this content up under a paid subscription plan.
If you’re interested in going deeper with me, and supporting my work with the neurodiverse community, I hope you’ll consider subscribing.
And if I don’t put that content up, and you really do want to see it, please send me a note. Let me know what you’d like to hear about.
We’ve all had a big year y’all. I hope you’re honoring your own strength as we all navigate this incredibly challenging time in human history. There are gifts sprinkled throughout, apparently. That’s been my experience.
Much love, happy holidays, and Happy New Year.